If, if, and if.

If I only have another day to live, I would break up with you and make you hate me. Then I'll act as if I'm free from your clucthes and go off for a holiday... I would die somewhere you can't see me or even know about what happened to me. All I would say is just sorry and I Love You silently in me. Acting strong and cruel, but deep inside feeling the pain as if a dagger had been stabbed into my heart. I'd rather be it like that.

Goes emo and this is what I do. Ifs'... These thing came up into my mind in a sudden. It's just plain unsecure feeling that came to me. As though as I've been hurt by someone, gotten myself scarred and emotional. Although I did not. I'm just blurred, mixed-up, and.... Stucked! I guess that's all I can do to describe my feelings now.

~signing off~

Just Not My Day.

Too many things to tell since the last time I logged-in here and blog... Good and Bad things happened... Well, some of the important events were Jia Min's birthday... Sweet time we were having without the guys... =D

Skip all those... Too much to tell in a day's time... Let those be memories... And I shall start with today! It's Just NOT my day!!!

It started off with a morning call from Hidea... It's not a good news... Having his leg sprained as someone stepped on it and just can hardly step on the floor... Had no choice but having himself admitted in GMC Hospital... I'd really thank Wonder for his help... If he hadn't been fetching us there, I'd be having some trouble settling some stuffs this morning... I'd really appreciate that... As for Hidea, he seemed to be kind of enjoying being admitted in hospital, other than being starved at night for the dinner was not served... Thanks to the absent minded nurses...

Okay, after these morning's incident of Hidea's, everything was quite fine till it came to the time I have to run off for training in college... Having some of my "stuffs" not found... I was quite frustrated by then... Yet I couldn't make any calls to tell them I might be late for training, as my phone line was barred due to the credit limit... It's okay~ All I thought what I needed to do is to just go off to the Maxis centre and get my bill paid! Went off to my car, can hardly start the engine as it was left undriven for weeks... I'm not surprised... I thought I would just drive without the air-conditioner to let it be warmed-up enough... There I go~ Window's opened!

Rushed to Maxis centre nearest to my house... Went in and surprisingly, SYSTEM DOWN! I was Down-er by then... I'm left with no phone to use and yet the bill still have to be paid... I was then issued a receipt and pay for it when their network system is done... Which is tomorrow... If they don't, I will go crazy!

I drove to college after that... The traffic was a BOOM! Flying car I was driving and still I was late for half an hour! Better than none still... The minute after I got my slippers changed into basketball shoes, tiem for me to get my windows closed and off my engine... That was when another thing happened! My left side window got stucked and can not be closed... GREAT! I couldn't try any much longer after 15 minutes, so I gave up... Leaving the window bare-screened and rushed in for training!

Forgotten everything when having training... For such a long time I did not sweat like that... Nearly vomited when my stamina comes to an end... That's also because I am dieting... Bear the pain and there I went again... When it was time for me to go home, thanks to Hamster and the others for their assistance to my car and have a look on what they could do... Too bad, it was a no! The window was totally stucked! Then I realized one more thing when I unlocked my car, that was I did not even locked my car! I was so glad that my car was still there... xD

Thanked God, Ah Neng was there to fetch Lake Ching... My Saviour! THANK YOU!!! Was really relieved when I saw the window slowly scrolled up little by little... =D

Dropped Ah Jun and Astin home and tailed Ah Neng back home using the "sua loh"... Then they planned to go over to Fettes park for dinner... I thought that it would be a show of gratitude by going along with them... At least I did chatted with them happily even though I was restraining myself from having dinner... One more surprise thing is that Lake Ching and Ah Neng both saying that me n Wonder are very matching from the pictures taken when we were standing together in the pictures of his sis-in-law's engagement day... =P

Went back home safely and found no parking again... Gotten used to it... Did my usual house chores as usual and now having my whole back ache... =(

Hoping for a better day tomorrow... I'm starving now... But will be determined! I would NOT eat!

~signing off~

Rainy Day.

It's raining hard today... Spent whole day at home being annoyed by Chloe... Thank God he's here to accompany... =P It's like just a moment he left my house and now I already start missing him! I know I'm being sickening but it's true... I just have to admit that... Hahaha... Anyway, still going off for dinner with him later... Roti Bakar! Kacau my sister over there... Working part-time... At the same time I'm finding reasons to eat! I was supposed to be dieting right now! Shit me~ =P

And now, since my sis is working part-time there, no one would be taking care of Chloe... Great! Two days in a week and I have to come back home early to babysit that notorious kid... LOL! I'll go crazy... Result was out yesterday... It's a satisfactory to me... Surprisingly, I've gotten an A for Hubungan Etnik! Which I thought I might have gotten a C or B! Funny~ As for Wonder... He had to resit for Microeconomics... =( I felt sad for him though he doesn't seem to mind... =.=" He better try his best this semester or I would kill him... xD

Next, school fees! After paying that, totally pok kai! My phone bill too... I guess I have to get myself a Digi sim-card... Argh~ Struggle hard... Don't care... Work more, Play less! I need a job at night... With reasonable pay and convenient for me... Where??? My sis had gotten her's... Now it's my turn! LOL!

Just watched Tv news... Operasi at UPR... Sapu all those people... Washeh~ Thank God I'm being good... No clubbing... xD

Now... I'm SUPERB BORED!!!

~signing off~

I found out that I've left out lots of things unpost on my blog and Facebook... Espeacially my photos... I would be Bomb-ing up my albums soon... xD Hmmm... I'm worried about my results now... Fuhh~ Wondering how it might be...

Watched Legend of The Guardians today... It was fascinating! But Wonder was freezing to death beside me... Yawning all the way... xD I guess I didn't feel anything as I was wearing long sleeves... LOL! All I knew is that I was enjoying the movie... Eglantine? Superb cute! Sorren? KEAT! Haha... Conclusion, the movie was great! It gave me somekind of feeling of being fascinated and it was really very enjoying... But of course, depends on who I'm watching with... =P

I hated my new time-table... Class starts late, ends late... And another thing... LECTURE! Super-HATE! Espeacially when I don't want to see that somebody during some lecture! =( Sipek DOWN~ Bo huat... I misses Jasmine! Hardly got someone to talk with when I'm bored in lecture hall other than Jia Min and Qiu Jia... =P IMY!!!

Guess I should be sleeping now... Its 1.54 am in the morning... LOL... Gotta wake up early tomorrow... Nights... =D

Boredom.

Yesterday was a quite boring day with nothing to do... All I did was sitting in front of my desktop for the half of the day... But things changed when it comes to the night... Steven, Jasmine, Wonder and I went for a movie in Gurney... It was supposed to be Legend of The Guardians at first... That Steven, saying that it's a "Gina Hi", changing our mind, we ended up watching... Well, it starts with the word "Legend" too, but ended with a "Fist"... LOL! The movie was not bad... Wonder kept yawning and was just waiting for the fighting part... But I wanted to watch that 3D movie so badly! That 'Eglantine'!!! Super cute!!! The white innocent-looking owl... Awww~ It melted my heart... I would have pinched its cheeks if it's for real... Wonder told me then it would have been dead... xD

He promised that we would be going for that movie... Whee~ I want to watch it so so so~

BADLY!

I <3 movies about Journeys, Supernaturals and Adventures... Storylines about Love and Comedies are also my favourites... Nowadays I guess I'm stuck to 3D Cartoonish movies... But I prefer to watch it without the 3D... For it makes me headache and the main thing is that they have got no subtitles... No good~ =P

After movie, we went for steamboat at Xuan Xin at Tanjong Tokong... Bloated my tummy with Tom Yams... Hehehe... Jas ended up being a... I don't know what you call that... People who mixes juices and something like 'bar girl'... Something like that la... LOL! Mixture of Blackcurrant, Orange, and Iced-Lemon Tea... Tasted good! Yum Yum~ xD

We spent time sitting alongside Gurney Drive... Nice wind I would say... Helps in rewinding our minds and it was high tide... Jas thought it was Tsunami when the waves hitted the rocks and onto the pavements... =D Funny girl she is...

Steven was so bored and he ended up with an idea suggesting we should take a stroll up to Batu Feringghi and back to Gurney again... That notorious guy... Hmm... Beh tahan sama dia... Raced with that "SLK" ( Kancil )... Win liao tiuk song liao... LOL! It's okay... Wonder and I kinda enjoy it at the backseat as we were not the ones driving... Haha...

Reached home quite late... And that would be one of the few times for the whole Sem-break... Gotta be "kuai kia" when Semester 2 starts... =)

~signing off~

Change in Life.

Lots of things happened in just a month... And now there are big changes in my life... Things were not as before... New Life, New Partner... Guess everyone was surprised to know that I've got a new boyfriend... And yes, it's Wonder... Never thought of it before... It's not only a surprise to everyone but to me myself too... =)

Anyway, I'll start off with our Genting trip, which was a blast! Couldn't believed that it gave me such wonderful time being with these crazy whackos! That goes to Ratatouile, Ah Bii, Wonder, Iron Man, Chao Paper, De ling, and Lee! xD The picture of us riding the 'Cyclone' was seriously doing its role... Every single time I was looking at the picture, it made me laugh! Not at anyone, but myself! LOL! I guess Lee seriously bought those two for RM15 each were for some reasons... xD Conclusion, the whole trip = Unexplainably shocking and Fun! =D

Now, bout Wonder... I was too afraid to accept him at first... The feeling of afraid I'm not a good girl for him makes me felt really down... The other problem is the people around us... But everything changed after the Genting trip... The whole happening kinda change my mind and gave me new hope, telling me to look forward and also asking me to move on... And I think that everyone will be getting used to it sooner or later... And I have to be ready of what people would be thinking or saying bout me... All the criticsisms... I know... I won't blame them but myself... I created all these myself... At least now me and Hidea are still friends after the broke up... It's not that bad after all... Life goes on pretty well... I was so scared and dare not to take any step of this problem before this... But now I realized that I should have did it earlier... It's good for the both of us...

Clear with what I'm doing now at least... =) Sure of course it won't be that easy for me to face all these... But, at least I tried... I know there are more obstacles to come in future... I promised myself that I would pull myself together and go through all these... I promised!

One thing I'm feeling bad now is that today is Hidea's mum's birthday... I sould be celebrating with them if all these did not happen... But since it already did, all I can do is to wish her a 'Happy Birthday' by sms... =(

I just browsed through his profile just now... And realized that all the songs he posted up in his profiles were all my favourites... Thinking back of all those memories that I should be forgetting now... For one and the last time... One of the songs seriously made me cried... And it's like a message from him to me... I thought he actually forgotten the song as it was like quite long ago since the last time we heard of it...

'Wo De Cuo' by B.A.D.



Those would be just memories from now onwards... And I've got a new datas to save from now onwards... It's from 18 Septeber 2010... The current new mystery that I should remember every second of it... =D

I won't forget every single thing that happened but, I promise that it would not be affecting the new current me... Promise is a promise!

Can't wait for Semester 2 to start... Would be shocking everyone in my class... LOL... My Gfs would be like OMG all around I guess... =P Looking forward for a movie! Legend of The Guardians!

~signing off~

Things not Done~

Things are still quite complicated now... Hardly have time to blog... Exams, Work, and Relationships are killing me! I'm just so tired... Thank God, I've got today to get myself relieved... Thanks to Ah Kiam, Pauline, Ashwin, and Hidea for this trip... =) Although it's just a visit to the Taiping Zoo and Gurney, it helps in everything... It ended up to be quite tiring... Still, I'm so afraid now... Its like whatever decisions I've made, Either someone's going to get hurt... I'm so uncertain about him... Now, I'm also afraid for myself... Which, I doubted his faithfulness... =(

I fell for HIM! At first I thought it was just a crush, which turned out to be not just a crush... Well, people who do not know the whole truth must be thinking that I left Hidea for Him just like that... There just another few reasons behind all these... But, I guess I shall not explain much... I knew myself well... But, it doesn't make me feel any better than a Jerk! Hidea is like a good guy I know... But what people do not know well bout him is that there's just so many stuffs undiscovered by them! Argh!!! I don't know how now... If only they know how am I feeling wouldn't that be like so much better??? I'd really don't know how to express my feelings to them! T.T

I'm really confused with everything now... All I know is that I screwed everthing up! =C